The last time a movie affected me like this was with La La Land two years ago. Only I knew how I felt about that movie after a couple of days. The case with 2018’s A Star is Born is slightly different.

When I first saw the movie, I was extremely confused and a bit angry at the movie. The reason being that I absolutely adore the first half of the movie but then things start going downhill for the characters and then the ending hit me and left me scarred. Despite hating the ending, I couldn’t stop listening to the soundtrack. After some time, I decided to revisit the movie and still, I couldn’t see the bigger picture. I tried to review the movie and it just became a rant, so I tried again and the review fell apart but for some reason I still posted it. Weeks have passed and it’s almost the end of the year and surprise, surprise, I’m still listening to the soundtrack.

There is always something that draws me back to the movie. Whether it’s the incredible music, great characters or just the overall atmosphere and emotion tied to the movie. I started thinking to myself, ‘If I hate the ending so much, why do I still keep wanting to go back and see it?’. I thought about it and there are a couple of factors to mention.

The reason I hated the ending so much was because it could’ve easily been avoided with a few changes. The thing is, this movie depicts alcoholism, substance abuse and suicide. I never dealt with any of those things nor do I know someone who does. I judged the movie because I was uneducated on the subject matter and I admit that’s wrong. I didn’t know what a alcoholic does to a relationship, I don’t know for a fact that if Ally had helped him get over his addiction, that the ending would be avoided, I am given what the movie shows and I have to use those events to judge the movie. That being said, the ending was a bit rushed, so that didn’t help.

Anyways, I was watching the music video for “I’ll Never Love Again” which is the final song performed in the movie. In the video they show tease many scenes from the ending and I was brought back to that rage that I felt after watching it for the first time. That rage didn’t come from hating the movie, it came from love weirdly enough. Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga are insanely likeable and charismatic, their casting makes you instantly care for the characters. The performances in this movie are so powerful and moving, it’s insane really. So when I saw Jackson go through all that pain at the end, it angered me.

Not to say this movie doesn’t have it’s flaws, especially in it’s second half which is flawed in my opinion. The pacing is rushed and some scenes are not prepared in advance as well as they should have been.

All in all, what makes A Star is Born so special is it’s emotional aspect. The strong emotions you get when you hear the music, when you see the ending, when you see them getting married. My heart soared when Ally sang Shallow for the first time, my heart broke when I saw Jackson crying and apologizing for his messes, my blood was boiling when Rez started belittling Jackson by telling him he’s ruining Ally’s life. If a movie makes you feel all those emotions on that high of a level, it did it’s job. What Bradley Cooper and Lady Gaga achieved with this movie is amazing.

If you missed A Star Is Born in cinemas, worry not! It will be released on DVD, Blu-Ray and 4K Ultra HD on February 11th! It’s available for pre-order now! If you can’t wait that long, it will be available on digital on January 15th.